In this age of dating, it is no longer taboo to admit that you're using some online dating site to find your potential partner (or next Saturday night meal). These days, the conversation starts with "so which online services are you using?" I know a few people who have been successful using Tinder, POF, Match and more! I've used all three myself at one point in my husband finding mission - I'm not married yet, but happily coupled up...thanks Tinder!
Okay, these online dating services are what you make of it, like with anything else. It all comes down to your intentions and how you approach it. If you've never tried online dating, get yourself one of the many apps and start getting yourself some dates!
For tips on how I approached these services such as Tinder, read on...
1. Pictures - this is debatable, but I posted 3 pics of myself. 2 Headshots, one where I'm glamified (I usually wear makeup in public), the other with minimal makeup and smiling and 1 Full body shot. You don't have to post all of these if you don't want, but I just imagine when I'm looking at a guy's pictures and think of what I would want to see.
2. Profile - Okay, not too many people actually read profiles. I personally read profiles, but most guys don't read profiles. I once specifically said "no hookups" and seemed to get more guys looking to hookup vs. when I didn't make that disclaimer...shrug. Keep it short and true to your personality. My rule of thumb was to only 'like' or 'swipe right' on guys who took the time to write a profile and post clear pics of themselves. No bathroom selfies - ugh!
3. Chatting - You've matched with someone and you're communicating, now what? I prefer to chat for a day or two tops and then plan to meet for coffee or lunch. I don't want to chat with anyone for weeks on end, finally meet to find out there is no chemistry. Best to meet and get that out of the way.
- While chatting, immediate turn off is a guy who wants to discuss sex. While, I'm not opposed to some late night sexting, I do however find it a huge turnoff to talk about sex with someone I am not actually having sex with. And in my experience, and guy who says he is great in bed usually isn't. The good ones don't brag, they show.
4. Meeting - I used to think that the playing coy on the first date was the way to go. Nope, I learned to make my intentions clear from the beginning. I'd even take this step during chatting, but sometimes you get caught up in witty banter and forget. I fully believe you should weed out anyone who isn't on the same journey as you as quickly as possible. No use in investing your time liking someone only to find out they want something casual while you're on your husband finding mission #truestory. Now, not everyone is on this mission, but if you're only looking for something casual, make that clear. We now live in a time when women can have sex without relationship or remorse, own it!
These tips are only based off of my experiences when doing the online dating thing. I've tried different ways of 'being myself' and came to the conclusion that being honest about what I wanted was the best way to save myself a lot of grief later on.
I hope these tips help, now go forth and date!
Are you online dating? I'd love to read your tips and/or stories.
Scarlett is a business owner and lover of pretty things. She started this blog to share some of her witticisms and favorite things.